Turning my head towards the heavens and reaching for the stars.

Why dig yourself a hole when you can be reaching for the stars?

This has been playing inside my head for the past month or so now.  I am digging a hole and soon it will be one that I will be unable to get out of.

When signing up for Rev3 I initially figured that I would get excited to do the race once I got into training.  Then at the start of the year when I was planning ahead to 2015 I caught myself saying every day that I was for some reason more excited about Ironman Chattanooga in 2015 than Rev3 Full Rev this year.

Then I was accepted to graduate school and then life threw some curve balls my way and really taught me a lesson.  I play wonder-woman in my life but I am not wonder-woman.  I am Jenniferlyn and I am just 1 person trying to live 3 lives.

Something has to give.  I am burnt out and emotionally shelled this year.  Do not get me wrong,  I am happy in life however I am exhausted and my anxiety has risen to record high levels this year.

I am an Ironman.  

Nothing will ever take that away from me.  It is now time that I stop defining myself by my physical accomplishments and start defining myself by my drive and ambition.  Going back to school has been an awakening for me and over the course of the past 10 weeks I have learned a lot more about myself and my desire to give my all to this process.  I am reinventing myself and in the process have changed my goals - where before I loved immersing myself in hours on the bike and running, now I love immersing myself in books and lectures, then going off and exploring the theories for myself.

I am learning all about taking care of the body and realize that I have a long way to go in that journey.

While I still love a good long bike ride and long run, and I still love long distance open water swims, I just do not love the idea of "having" to do them.  Once the verbiage in my head switches from an appreciative and blessed "get to do the workout" to a burned out and obligated "have to do the workout" I know that tides are changing and that it is time to switch it up for a while.  

The excitement I once felt by pushing myself to break through my self-imposed barriers, and all of the hours that I have trained to get myself out of my own way is still there, only this energy is focused at the mental not physical.   Instead of playing out on a training plan and race course over 140.6 miles, it will be played out inside my head and in application through functional science.

Artwork is an original by  animemaddiechan on deviantArt
When 2016 comes around and I get ready to walk across the stage,  it will be a stage in an auditorium filled with people cheering as I accept my Master's and then again after completion of my dissertation when I walk across another stage to receive my PhD.

The Ironman stage will always be there waiting for me, and I am genuinely excited for the day that we shall meet again.

This year I am excited to put another 2 Half Ironman races under my belt (maybe 3 if I go back to Miami this November) and a few more half marathons.  I am excited to work on my weak spot of running over the summer and to give it my all on September 7th at Rev3 Half Rev.  

Part of being authentic and true to myself is to follow my heart and pursue my dreams with love and focus.  That is just who I am.  I am an all in person.  Now I want to see how many stars I can touch and how much knowledge I can help spread across the land.  It is time to give back and help others in my life.  It is time to help the next generation of dreamers achieve what they desire.  

It is time to SHINE!

What are you doing in your life to reach for the stars?  Are you stuck digging holes instead?  Reach out to me... we can turn that head towards the heavens and make those dreams a reality!


Popular posts from this blog

My heart beats a happy beat; IM70.3 Ohio Taper week is here!

Ironman after crisis: My heart and courage are put to the test